Patti Cohen decides to take a load off in the Gaslamp bar after her 14 hour day shredding Elon Musk's digital footprint, not shredding so to say but putting a fresh layer of snow over his tracks. The bar door swings open to Alex Warhol yelling about the future of postmodernism, "Novel creation is dead we only have relics desperate to be recreated." Locke O'Puerta won't have it and starts back saying how we never created anything to begin with. Warhol replies with the spite only a true cynic could have, "If only they accepted their condition they might be saved! No use crying over spilled soup." Ginsberg chimes in with his Eastern wisdom (Eastern European of course), saying that you can't save anyone, and we should all just cry a bit more. The Greek corner starts in with their authoritarian passive aggression. In the stifled anger he's so used to, Tim the Stoic orates a well crafted yet nonjudgmental speech about how suffering is overrated and we should all just calm down a bit. This draws forth a nightlong debate among the rest of the Greeks about who's most unbothered by the postmodern condition. Glancing back in their direction, one will notice only faces with stony complexions, and hands gripping drinks in white knuckled fury. Jane Dylan (self styled of course), can't stand it and asserts that Bob Dylan was the architect of the postmodern man, and he was plenty bothered. Immanuel Halbdrunken sways in his whisky stupor grumbling about how it was really Nietzsche, John the Baptist interrupts him and says it was actually Jesus. Now our dear Patti watched this conflict stir for nearly an hour before the Sumerian corner says that Gilgamesh was really the first postmodernist. Grasping at straws for postmodernists that predate recorded history was a feat that even the scattered archeologists couldn't tackle, no one likes the idea of a postmodern T-Rex anyway, that just doesn't make sense. Tim the Stoic got bored of being unbothered and describes t how this debate isn't so Socratic after all, "None of you know anything. Conflict only tears us apart.", "Bob already wrote about that in Tambourine Man!" shouts back Jane Dylan, "So did Aristotle! And he's been ripped off for 2000 years not 60" shouts back Tim the Stoic, finally breaking his moderacy. Jamie Doe pipes up about Aristotles' pronouns, but John and Jane tell them that philosophers can't be non binary, a common argument among these triplets. By this time Warhol's passed out mumbling insults to the rotating cast of TV news reporters who switch every 15 minutes, Halbdrunken is debating morality to a wall, and Patti Cohen thinks it's time to change her name and start all over, maybe Tanya. Jane strikes a match and sets off, trading the stench of revolution in the bars air for the sterile night winds outside. The bartender ends this insanity with the bell for second to last call, drawing a resounding sigh from everyone still conscious, a sorry ending to another great night.